Artists Block

I’m having a slight problem. I’ve hit a brickwall, a dead end, an artist’s form of ‘writers block’ and the more I focus on my lack of painting, the more I feel guilty and all these negative feelings are not conducive to any sort of creativity and so it goes on. I’m caught in a vicious circle.

I think all artists have some form of block at various times. My friend Jani has an Imp. Hers tells her that she’s no good at her art.

I too am having self-doubt. I feel like a fraud. Ive stopped painting because of this very belief. I should be doing something more productive like…, well.......Ive not worked that one out yet!

To get me out of this self-destructive pattern, ive hitched a cunning plan.

Going back to jani’s troublesome Imp, I’ve imagined my little quandary to be a pixie! Im not sure why it’s a pixie, I think maybe because pixies can be playful and mischievous, they mean no real harm.

So anyway, giving my ‘block’ an imaginary identity, Im allowing to draw my attention to him. (if you pardon the pun). I'm not fighting to ignore him and so that makes me feel a little peaceful inside already. I mean who really wants to fight internal battles with oneself anyway?!

As I am typing, I can see him in my minds' eye, he’s wearing a soft velvety green jacket, suede brown trousers and funky red shoes. He’s sat opposite me, smirking coz he knows I have been listening to his cruel teasing over the last week. But the thing is, where he comes from, is a beautiful land where many other beautiful characters live and love and in my imagnination, I can enter his world whenever I like.

My little pixie isn’t quite so confident now! In his kingdom, he’s nothing but ‘just’ a pixie. Just a little aggravating individual who uses cruel teasing and taunts to pass the time and I know, that given time, he will get bored and move onto someone else who might give him the time of day. Or maybe he will go play on the swing!

As well as my pixie, I see fairies and elves and even Jani’s Imp! They are surrounded by butterflies and Owls, Badgers and Foxes, they all hold a certain charm about them, even my infuriating pixie!

Where they live, the colours are vibrant and cheerful to the soul, their world is playful, loving and magical and I play with them amongst the trees and it makes me happy. So happy infact, I want to reach for my paintbrush…..

..So you see, my cunning plan worked! I’m painting again!